Methods of Self Loathing
by VeniVidiViciMR
Summary: The war is over and life must go on, Draco Malfoy has difficulties with this but finds unrelenting support from a very unlikely source, who is Astoria Greengrass and what is to become the two stubborn souls? M for later chapters.
1. Afternoon Tea and Meddling Mothers

**Ok here is my idea of a multichapter Draco/Astoria story, because really, who didn't almost scream for joy when it was announced that Draco didn't end up with Pansy? **

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><p>Draco snorted delicately at the parchment he held in his hands, he forced himself to stay aloof and roll his eyes at the letter as he read it for at least the twelve times. He set it down and strode out of the room.<p>

What did they think they were playing at, inviting him back to Hogwarts to repeat his seventh year _properly_. McGonagall must have been out of her mind when she sent that to him.

He continued down the long hallway of the manor until he reached the gardens, wincing slightly at the sudden brightness of the light in his eyes he made his way to the table that had been set up with afternoon tea. Draco Malfoy hated afternoon tea, or at least that's what he tried for years to convince him of.

But now, the war being over and his life settling down more so, he indulged in the normalcy of scones and tea at 2 everyday. His mother started this tradition that the two of them now hold, mostly as a way to insert that normalcy back into his life.

Just as Draco sat in his chair and glanced out over the newly planted grounds he heard the swishing of his mothers robes.

Narcissa Malfoy sparred her son a brilliant smile before it slowly slide from her face, it was no secret that she had been suffering greatly due to the loss of her husband, who was sentenced to life imprisonment after the war. It was difficult for her to move past the loss and she relied heavily on her son these days for silent moral support.

It had been exactly 64 days since the end of the war and Narcissa couldn't have been more thrilled with the life she saw in her son, for at one point in her life she had fallen under the assumption that Lucius and herself had ruined him. And that had nearly killed her.

Narcissa's face turned sly for a second as she sipped her tea delicately, "is there anything you'd like to share with me darling?" she asked innocently.

Draco set his tea down before his eyes met his mother's, he was unnerved by the gleam there that he hadn't seen since he was a child, "no mother…?" he replied unsure.

Narcissa's hand slipped into her robe as she produced the letter from earlier, and Draco's face paled considerably, "Surely the house elf didn't open your letter" she said as she began to read from the letter, "To Mr. Draco and Mrs. Narcissa Malfoy, Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is pleased to reopen its doors to-"

"Stop" Draco said suddenly, "Don't buy into it mother, they don't want me back, how could they? I was a monster, I _am_ a monster," he muttered darkly, casting his eyes off into the distance.

His mother grasped his hand securely, "no more thinking like that Draco, you will finish your schooling at Hogwarts then you will return home and the manor will be yours by right"

Draco was so shocked his eyes flew to his mothers, "but mother, he- he isn't dead"

Narcissa winced, "I've asked him to sign the title to you immediately, he wont ever be out so there is no sense in him holding on to it" she said, a cool air in her voice.

Draco squeezed his mother's hand warmly, recognizing her chilly demeanor as her coping mechanisms for dealing with her newfound loneliness.

"I received another letter today" she said, skillfully changing the subject away from her weakness, the way only a pureblood woman knew how.

"Oh?" Draco asked as he retracted his hands and sipped his now chilly tea.

"Yes, a party invitation, to a ball" she seemed eager about something, though Draco could not guess what. His mother didn't want to go to these functions as much as he didn't. She didn't want to be talked about or to necessarily. She was in no mood to be pitied either. It didn't help that she really hadn't left the house since the war ended, house arrest or not.

He frowned, "really? So soon…" he remarked quietly.

"Yes well did you really expect the pureblood families to cast aside everything, despite the war?" she asked waving her hand slightly, as she retrieved the invitation.

"I suppose not, it just seems sudden… you weren't thinking of going were you?" he asked suspiciously eyeing the message in her hands.

"Only if you invite me darling, after all you represent the family now, I would simply be your date… unless you have another in mind?" she asked, not even bothering to mask her eagerness at this as she leaned forward in her wrought iron chair.

Draco stifled a groan, of course this was what she was getting at, she wanted him to be married. That was all she ever wanted for him, happiness, family and love.

He made a face at his mother and held out his hand, "can I see the invitation?"

She hesitated before handing it to him, "you remember their daughter, yes?"

"Greengrass" he muttered as his hands worked over the green and silver invitation, "yes, Daphne was in my year…" he sighed and looked up at his mother.

"She's a lovely girl Draco," she hinted not at all bashfully.

"Yes, lovely in appearances mother, her personality would make you purposely straggle yourself with a-"

"Draco!" Narcissa scolded, not being able to stomach any violent remarks since her time with the Dark Lord living in their home.

"Sorry" he muttered, finishing his tea and rising, "no, I have no one in mind to take, and I would love for you to accompany me" with that he set the invitation next to his Hogwarts letter and strode angrily into the house not bothering to wait for a reply from his mother.

Whatever happened to calming afternoon tea with his mother? Oh that's right, his mother the matchmaker seemed to find a need to ruin it.

He grumbled as he strode back into the house, passing the drearier areas that had suffered damage during the time's Voldemort stayed with them.

Shivers flew down his spine as he passed the now permanently locked dinning room where a Hogwarts teacher had been murdered and eaten right in front of his very eyes.

Draco shoved the images and memories from his mind and walked slowly on the stairs, tomorrow was Monday, and he was to return to 'work'. He sighed again and stepped into his personal library, finding solace in the quite, low lit room, he melted into a large deep green leather chair and retrieved a book from the many littered around the room, diving into the enfolding story.

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><p><strong>Please tell me what you think, even if you hated it... actually I hate when authors beg for Reviews. <strong>

**Ehh review if you want. **


	2. St Mungos and a Girl with Plan

**My friend told me to never update twice in one night, or like 5 minutes between each chapter, but it's always better reading more of a story before you decide if you want to follow it and stuff. Anyway, this is me, ignorng my friends advice, and updating approziamtly 5 minutes after my first chapter went up.**

**Haha I hope you enjoy!**

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><p>"Ahh Mister Malfoy, good of you to join us on time today. Here is your assignments, please turn in the clipboard to Mrs. DeCrane on your way out" the tiny healer squealed as he shoved the clipboard into Draco's hands and took off down the crowded hallways of St. Mungos.<p>

Draco stifled another groan, not Miss. DeCrane. He had nothing against the other healing assistants but Miss. DeCrane always found reasons to brush against him while he 'worked'.

Working was putting it well… wrong. See he wasn't getting paid for his efforts so many would call it volunteering, but that wasn't right either, because he was not there of his own free will.

65 days ago the war had ended, and 60 days ago his family had been taken into court, and charged with various crimes. Due to his mother's sacrifice near the end of the war, she was simply put on house arrest for 60 days, though that had ended recently she still tended to stick near to home, not wanting attention of any sort.

His father was sentenced immediately to lifetime imprisonment, and Draco had surprisingly felt nothing, he held his mother while she sobbed into his chest as they took him away and he shared a look with his father.

It clearly said, _take care of your mother_. But held nothing of regret, and that sickened Draco, who had been feeling the regret and fear boiling and itching at his skin since he was a sixth year.

Draco on the other hand, had been sentenced to community service. He knew this was letting him off easy so he stayed silent, even when presented with the various positions.

St. Mungos would not have been his top choice but he felt that he did not deserve to choose, nor could he locate his voice after he saw his father being carted away and his mother imprisoned in her own home.

However, here he was, spending several hours a day in a hospital that was treating people he most likely was at some fault for their injuries.

So now he glanced down at the clipboard, hoping to see something related to what he had done the previous Friday, which was shadowing a poison master as he made rounds and created antidotes to strong lethal poison.

It was exciting and Draco was fascinated. Of course he never did anything that related to making the antidotes or any sort, he really just stood around and retrieved various ingredients when the master demanded them.

But alas, today he was shadowing a regular. That is, a normal healer, one that made rounds to those who believed themselves ill in some way. He sighed but made his way to the 8th floor anyway, searching for Mrs. Fuller.

When he found her she was rubbing thick yellow paste on a rather chubby witches back, attempting to cure gigantic, crater size zits that had appeared.

"You my charge today?" she barked at Draco, who was fighting not to throw up, he simply nodded and she stepped back, "good, finish this up and meet me in my office after"

Draco had to swallow his disgust as he stepped forward and rubbed the paste into the craters and the witch blushed furiously when she saw his rather devilishly handsome face.

She hid her face then and he finished without speaking a word to her, promptly washing his hands, at least 4 times and fleeing the room before he could throw up all over her.

He made his way to Mrs. Fuller's office up on the 11th floor and knocked, she opened it and thrust another clipboard into his hands, "clean out Mr. McDonald's ear, _thoroughly_, and give him a sponge bath. Then you can go." She barked and shoved him out, slamming the door in his face.

Draco nearly smiled, he liked Mr. McDonald, he was an old man, and had been the only one to not gasp when he learned Draco's name, though Draco suspected that was because he had no idea what Draco had done in the war.

He walked to the elevator and went down to the 6th floor, then walked all the way to the end of the ward to Mr. McDonald's room, he opened the door gently, "Mr. McDonald. Its Draco Malfoy"

Mr. McDonald was staring off into space, and Draco now understood why he needed to have his ear cleaned out. He stepped into the room, and into his line of sight.

The man jumped, "Ah my boy, you gave me a fright, sneaky little Slytherin aren't you?" he grinned, showing off all of his yellow teeth.

Draco just walked over to him and held up his want, muttering a few incantations he was able to remove most of the earwax that plagued his ears, "better sir?"

"Ah-ah no need to yell dear boy" he said wincing as Draco retrieved a sponge and charmed it to clean the mad off, then sat in a chair and observed, "Ahh hits the spot every time, don't worry I wont tell" he winked and Draco nodded back at him.

Part of the deal was that Draco was not allowed to use magic to complete his tasks, thus the rather gross ones were all that more gross. Yet Mr. McDonald was fine with Draco using magic to give him baths as long as the sponge 'hit the spot'.

"So how's your mother boy?"

"Trying to send me back to school, and get me married off at the same time…" he sighed and shook his head, "she means well but she misses father" he said father stiffly, as if it left a taste of iron in his mouth.

Mr. McDonald winked, "I just so happen to have an eligible grand daughter about your age, wouldn't want to meet her would you?" he asked cheekily.

Draco grimaced, "I think I'll have enough trouble fighting off my mother with her line of 'suitable ladies' god help me" he muttered

"You're a dashing fellow, I'm sure you had plenty of ladies at school, fancy calling one of them up"

"School was never for school, or romance Mr. McDonald. I had a job to do, there was no time for distractions," he said bitterly, as the sponge finished and the old man chuckled like he was making a sort of joke.

"I should be going… there's a ball tonight. Should be… interesting"

"Snag a few numbers for me boy, I need some female company in my old age"

Draco shook his head fighting a smile as he took his clipboards to the front desk and dropped them there, hoping to get away before-

"Draco!" came the squeal, "D-raa-co!"

He stopped and turned to face the bright pink witch hurrying towards him, he recognized her hazily from his school days, she was one year ahead of him, but always found the time to flirt mercilessly now.

"I guess I'll see you tonight then" she said slyly

"Sorry?"

"You are going to the Greengrass's party tonight right?" she sounded desperate as she glanced up at him through her eyelashes, looking not seductive, but deranged.

"Yes"

"You have a date?" she pressed, stepping closer

"Yes." He said firmly, "my mother will attending with me" he regretted telling her this because she grinned and flounced off before turning.

"Do save me a dance!" then she slipped behind the desk and gossiped obviously with the other woman sitting there.

Anna DeCrane would be the death of him. There was no way his mother could ever meet her, or she would end up his wife before he knew what was happening.


	3. Pureblood balls and a Dark Haired Beauty

**Ok, this is the Ball scene... so enjoy!**

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><p>"Draco? Are you ready yet?" Narcissa called gently, never exactly raising her voice yet Draco knew from her tone that she was getting impatient, from outside her son's quarters.<p>

His quarters, not room, consisted of a bathroom, small sitting room, bedroom and an office library, where he spent much of his time, reading in the hazy darkness to get away from the world as well as brewing potions, a passion that had hastily turned to near obsession.

"Draco please, you know how I hate to be late and we have to floo into the Greengrass estate" she trailed off unsure.

Draco sighed from within, he knew his mother was still delicate from being subjected to random Ministry questionings and searches, and now that she was off house arrest she was not allowed to apperate.

He opened the door to see his mother looking as regal as she had in the months leading up to the return of the dark lord, she faded for a while, but now she was back and he couldn't help but to smile when he looked down at her, offering her his hand, "You look lovely mother"

She smiled and slipped her ivory gloved arm through his, allowing herself to be guided through the halls to their grand fireplace, "Oh darling if you continue to be so charming, we wont have any trouble finding you a suitable match"

Draco sighed softly but otherwise ignored the comment, glancing instead at his mother who smiled smugly and thoughtfully, her white blonde ringlets curled up into a gorgeous up-do and her silver gown accented perfectly by his midnight black crisp silk robes.

She stepped into the fire first with a frown of annoyance on her face, before throwing the floo powder down and calming stating, "Greengrass estate" then she disappeared in the green fire and left Draco to ponder some things over.

Should he go? How angry would she be if he showed up late?

That was enough to have him scrambling into the gigantic marble fireplace and throwing the powder down just as his mother did, "Greengrass estate" he muttered and then gingerly stepped out of an equally extravagant fireplace to the sound of music and near intolerable schmoozing.

He spotted his mother, already in the middle of the party speaking with a couple and their daughter, Draco stifled another groan but she caught his eye and he made his way over, brushing the dust from his robes as he did so.

"And this is my son Draco, Draco you must remember Charity Eisensson, she'll be returning to Hogwarts in the fall as well, a sixth year dear?"

"Yes ma'am" charity whispered, blushing furiously when Draco stooped to kiss her hand.

"Its lovely to see you again Charity, would you care to dance?" he said as he rose and offered her a fake half smile and his hand.

She took it happily and pranced off with him. Draco led her out onto the dance floor and they joined hands, dancing. Draco knew what a good dance partner he could be, he had danced his whole life. He also knew how to be extremely charming when he wanted to be.

He twirled her around, determined to actually show her a good time, and hopefully get his mother off his back for the rest of the night.

That however was too much to ask, Charity certainly enjoyed herself, and proved to be quite the little chatterbox by the end of their second consecutive dance. She chatted and flirted shamelessly, Draco led her off the dance floor and back over to her parents before kissing her hand and thanking her for the dance.

She looked extremely disappointed until he explained that he wanted to dance with his mother before she was asked by men.

He strode through the people chatting and dancing to find his mother seated at a table, she looked rather glum.

"Mother?" he asked carefully as he sat down, Narcissa didn't meet her sons eyes.

"Its just strange, right Draco? You feel it too… the shift in power. They used to adore us, and now, its like we have to fight for any attention…"

Draco reached over and grasped her hand, "Its alright mother, people are just tentative. You knew they would be this way."

"Yes I suppose" she trilled off before snapping back into the present, "Oh! Wasn't she just the sweetest thing? No?"

Draco sighed and sat back in his chair.

"Dracy!" he heard and immediately his blood ran cold. _Not Pansy._

Narcissa sat up straighter when she saw the girl force her way through the crowds and throw herself at Draco, who was still sitting down.

"Draco, darling, introduce me" Narcissa insisted, her voice hinting at becoming icy.

"Mother, Pansy Parkinson" he said, knowing that his mother would know all about Pansy.

Draco admitted to his mother a couple summers ago that he was no virgin, and that was initially attributed to Miss Pansy Parkinson. She was more then willing at any time, which came in particularly useful during the stress of his sixth year, she was a wonderful stress reliever as long as she kept her mouth shut and her hands to herself in public.

But that was all she was.

"Its so great to meet you Mrs. Malfoy, Draco tells me such wonderful things about you" she gushed, Narcissa, however, looked unimpressed.

"Yes, he's a sweet boy"

"Dracy lets dance!" Pansy whimpered in his ear.

Draco stood, fumbling with his collar a little, "I just need to be excused for a moment, after that, alright Pansy?"

His mother continued to talk to Pansy as Draco fought to remain calm. He stood and glanced down at her, "care for a drink mother?"

"Oh! Well I suppose but-"

"Right, I'll be back soon." He was careful to stand just out of sight for Pansy to give up waiting for him but he was whisked into conversation with an 'old family friend', as he would describe himself.

"I suppose Hogwarts ought to be even more of a disappointment now wont it?" the crude boy was asking as he continued to bash the establishment and all the teachers within the school.

Of course, Draco Malfoy would never be caught dead defending Hogwarts or the teachers, but after his encounter with the old Muggle Studies teacher, the one eaten by the snake, he would never feel the same about the teachers, or anyone else for that matter.

He had learnt an important lesson, all blood mattered enough so as not to be shed, sure his blood was _better_ but no blood should ever be spilt.

So Draco just nodded to the boy and took another sip from his drink, glancing over at his mothers table to check for Pansy, but instead what he saw nearly made him drop his glass.

Anna. Sitting with his mother, looking perfectly normal, and dare he say… pretty. That ghastly stalker was perfectly laid back and charming, she was such a conniving little-

"Excuse me" Draco said suddenly when he just couldn't stand to be in the room anymore, when he felt like the walls would come crashing down and all people would do was watch them and make snide remarks about it. Because that's how you did it in the Pureblood world, you sat back and did nothing, then complained about _everything_.

It was sickening, and sometimes Draco couldn't hold onto his mask of indifference, and he really, really needed to go somewhere and scream at the top of his lungs.

The boy Draco hadn't bothered to learn the name of nodded and Draco made a beeline for the exit of the ballroom.

He wandered for a little while, then he came across a balcony and slipped outside, leaning over the edge with his eyes closed he tried to catch his breath. He found public events like these stifling normally, and now, he was coming to realize, they were close to unbearable for longer periods of time.

It was so hard to not remember everything, so hard to move on and expect to be _happy_ after everything that had happened.

"What's wrong? Come to escape your fan club? Parkinson got to you didn't she?" came a sarcastic voice from behind him, positively oozing fake concern and pity almost to the point of condescension.

He whirled around to see a girl sitting cross legged on a bench reading a book, she never bothered to look into his eyes, or even raise them from her book.

"At least I wasn't asked to leave to spare others eyes" he ground out on instinct, not that the girl was ugly, actually he couldn't see her at all.

He expected her to yell or run off but she just laughed, "I'd rather be asked to leave then forced to flee. How is dear old Pansy, still warming your bed and guarding your trousers with her minimal experience with magic?" she asked as she idly flipped the page of her book.

"Who are you?" he barked out, as he strode closer to her, "_Lumos_" he muttered and his wand lit up.

"no one you would bother to know" she said again, the same bored demeanor.

He saw her face though, it was chalk white, just like his, but her hair was black, and luscious, went about mid back if he had to guess and was curly, but not unmanageable. Her lips were a perfect bow shape and were cherry red, but not caked on with make up, non of her face was.

She was slender, but, and he was not a pervert, he could see a prominent chest and probably hips as well. She was small thought, he would have to guess about 5'4 from her seated position. She was gorgeous.

"What's your name? how do you know who I am? And about… Pansy?" he demanded, now standing above her his arms crossed tightly across his chest. It occurred to him that he sounded and looked like a reprimanded child and dropped his arms.

This time she snorted and looked up at him, her piercing green eyes nearly making him stumble backwards, "Everyone knows who you are, besides Pansy broadcasts your relationships for everyone to hear, your _hers_. Personally it reminds me of when dogs piss on things to mark their territory but that just might be her little pug-face" she shrugged and went back to her book.

Draco laughed, he actually laughed. It felt like it was the first real loud laugh he had since before the war, and Voldemort. Its seemed like forever.

Shocked, he stopped, but only for a minute to register how good it felt to feel his face stretch in a genuine grin rather then his telltale smirk.

The girl blinked, seemingly shocked as well, as he sat next to her, pulling the book from her delicate looking hands and examining it, "Did you read the first in this series first?" he asked her.

"N-no actually I read the last one, because it-"

"Said not to in the introduction" he said and laughed again, once again baffling not only himself but the beautiful girl sitting next to him, "so did I" he handed it back to her and stood up.

She looked utterly confused and just sat there, so he offered her his hand, she just stared at it.

"Care for a dance?" he asked, a smile still playing gently on his lips, a feeling that he could get used to.

"No" she said instantly, not breaking eye contact and displaying no emotion whatsoever.

"No?" he questioned, slowly retracting his hand, like she had insulted him, which she had in a way, simply because it was the first time this had ever happened to him.

"No. no I don't want to dance with you" she said rolling her eyes as soon as she seemed to recover from the trance his real laugh had sent her in.

"Come on, I'm not going to snatch your hand away, just dance with me." He said, this would be the first time any girl had declined a dance with him, and it was making him uncomfortable. Uncharted territories, even when Malfoy's are bad, people still want every piece of them they can get.

She ignored him and he stomped off, completely and utterly unsure of himself around girls for the first time ever.

He was so absorbed in his thoughts of the dark haired girl that hid from the party that he didn't notice the attention he received when he walked back into the ballroom. At first that is. Then it was painfully obvious ever stare he was getting.

Given most of the stares came from girls either his age, slightly younger, slightly older or _very much_ older. The last making him cringe visibly. The next was from weary fathers and eager mothers, both contemplating having he, Draco Malfoy as a son in law. The last were the Anti war/ anti Voldemort people, all staring at him with a mix of loathing and shear pity, though genuine Voldemort haters were generally not Purebloods.

These emotional stares he was getting were enough to make the food in his stomach lurch uncomfortably, and erase the girls image from his mind while he sought out his mother, hoping to ignore the stares in general.

When he finally found her he held out his hand and took on his best gentleman, bowing slightly and giving her a winning half smirk, this was enough to make his slightly scared looking mother laugh gleefully and take his hand appreciatively, "Darling, you never fail to charm me. But have you found a girl so willing tonight?"

"Please not now mother" Draco sighed as he thoughts were once again infiltrated with the gorgeous dark haired girl with the green eyes that nearly forced him to his knees in front of her.

"Draco, Draco" she criticized teasingly, "There must be a girl on your mind, I can see it in your eyes" She hadn't brought up Anna yet, which Draco decided, with the help of this question, was a very bad thing.

This meant that she was considering her, she _liked_ her. Merlin help him if she was to do anything else. And knowing Narcissa Malfoy, she would do just about anything she pleased, meddling be damned.

"Yes mother, its Pansy" he drawled sarcastically raising an eyebrow at her, knowing how his mother would not like that idea one bit.

He was right; she went tense in his arms and gave him a reproachful look, "that girl can fill your _nights_ until you find a suitable match, but there will be no talk of marrying Pansy Parkinson around me ever again, Draco Malfoy. Do you understand me?"

It was the first time she had scolded him since the war and he had to blink several times to regain his composer, "It- I was joking mother, not her, I promise"

"Of course you were" she said, her loving tone back again.

When the song ended mother and son walked back to their table in the corner, but they had not reached it before Draco caught the eye of Theodore Nott striding towards him.

"I'll be back shortly mother…" he met Nott halfway, "Nott" he nodded in greeting of his old classmate, and possibly current classmate.

"Malfoy. How have you been?" he asked, the stiff sound in his voice disappearing as their conversation went on.

"Surviving, are you going back?" Draco asked blatantly.

"Yes, mother is insistent that its in my best interest to finish my schooling" he said rolling his eyes slightly, and ruffling his sleeves.

"Mine as well, she's also choosing a bride as we speak" he said indicating Narcissa who was now talking to a blonde with a rather large arse. Draco shook his head again sighing as his mothers antics.

Her heart was in the right place, but this was getting extreme.

"Draco! Darling, come meet Lydia!" Narcissa called easily through the crowds to her son.

Draco sighed, "See you around Nott" Theodore nodded and Draco walked through the crowd back to his mother, who was fawning over the new girl's 'lovely blonde locks'.

"Oh Draco there you are! This is Lydia Oclins, she's a year below you, surely you've already had the pleasure"

Draco pretended to smile warmly at the girl and shook his head, "I'm afraid not, but the pleasure is all mine now" he said offering her a hand, "Care to dance?"

She nodded eagerly and grasped his hand tightly as he led her out to the dance floor.

They twirled and dipped for a few minutes and Lydia looked positively thrilled to be dancing with Draco, but he was utterly bored, instead filling his mind with the images of his past, dwelling on the less miserable things in order to fill the time.

On one particular turn, however, he did happen to meet two dangerously beautiful green eyes, and he nearly dropped Lydia from shock.

The girl was making her way, gracefully over to the main table and she locked eyes with his for a mere second before the turn was over and she was gone.

After the dance Draco feigned being tired and quickly searched the room for either his mother or the elusive dark haired girl. He found his mother chatting with Mrs. Greengrass and made his way over quickly.

"Ah Draco, just the boy we were searching for, perhaps you'd be willing to dance with my youngest? She seems to have wandered off most the night and I'd just die if she were to not have at least some fun tonight"

"Of course Mrs. Greengrass, I'd be honored" He assumed she was speaking about Daphne because she had never mentioned having a younger sister, only ever older ones. Whom were married and lived out of the country.

"Astoria, darling, please come here" Her tone was less the loving, clipped and agitated at best.

Draco turned to his mother in shock, who was Astoria Greengrass? He looked over to see his mother looking quite confused as well, "Ah Poppy I didn't know you had four daughters!" she said

Mrs. Greengrass surveyed her quickly, "Yes my youngest is going into her seventh year, she's in Ravenclaw though… Draco, you wouldn't have known her"

Draco turned then just in time to lock eyes with now hesitant but still powerful green ones, she was begging with her eyes.

He smirked at her and offered a hand, "Care to dance?"

He could tell she was fighting to say no but with her mother standing there she had no choice, "Yes, thank you" she said curtly, her voice like acid.

He chuckled and pulled her onto the dance floor, instantly pulling her tightly to his chest, "Ironic isn't it? that I asked you to dance and you turn me down, but now your mother all but _begs_ me to dance with you… hmm."

"Ironic isn't the word I would use" she spat out.

Draco spun her in a graceful circle, "Of course not. But then again, who are you Miss. Astoria Greengrass?" Another smirk lit up his face, "Whatever happened to perfect Daphne, the _youngest_ of the Greengrass _trio_?"

"'fraid I ruined my family name when I landed myself in Ravenclaw" she said stiffly, feigning nonchalance, but he saw the bitterness in her words.

"Hmm, interesting. I don't see it in you, Ravenclaw that is. Your too… cunning and dare I say, brave? But your tongue is smart, and quick" he glanced down at her mouth, lingering for a second longer then necessary and then returning to her eyes. He detected a small blush as he passed her cheeks.

"It doesn't matter what you see in me, you've never noticed me before, why should you bother now?" she said harshly.

"Oh-ho, a little bitter are we Greengrass?" he said smugly.

She diverted her eyes and a blush colored her cheeks marvelously, for reasons unknown to Draco, thought he assumed it was in anger.

The song ended and they stood on the dance floor awkwardly, she was looking at the floor and he bent down to whisper into her ear, "I'll be seeing you Greengrass, save a dance at the next ball." He said and gave her a suggestive wink before sauntering back to his mother.

Thrusting his hands deep into the pockets of his finest dress robes he strode purposefully back to his mother, not even glancing back at the girl left to stomp back to her table in mortification and a sort of sick twisted joy.

Narcissa Malfoy cocked an eyebrow when her son suddenly reappeared in front of her, the ghost of a real smile etched onto his perfect pale face, "Draco? She's a lovely girl, though her mother-"

"Is salty that she didn't end up in Slytherin" Draco finished, offering his arm to his tired looking mother, "Come on mother, your tired, and you haven't been out this long since..." he let himself trail off, not wanting to rehash painful memories for either of them, least of all his fragile mother.

Draco led his now silent mother to the grand fireplace just outside the ballroom and allowed her to step in first, he waited until the last lick of green flame was gone before he glanced back into the room to seek out the dark haired beauty he had every intention of getting to know better.

Having not been able to locate her he stepped into the fire as well and threw down a marginally large amount of floo powder, "Malfoy Manor".

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><p><strong>I know I said I wont demand reviews, but I do like to be told when my stories have flaws that are my own mistakes, such as hair color (a problem I recently had, blonde to black in a month= not so possible) or anything else. Thanks!<strong>


	4. Diagon Alley and Poisonous Encounters

**Ok, here is chapter four!**

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><p>The next few weeks passed in a blur, days somehow disappeared into the clutches of St. Mungos and Draco's community service completion was fast approaching.<p>

So when he had finished it was bittersweet.

There was no doubt that he would not miss the bustling hospital and its ridiculous staff, nor the whiney and judgmental patients that landed themselves there in the first place.

Yet he found himself longing for something to do in the upcoming week that prelude Hogwarts. He felt no desire to spend any time at the rotten hospital but he was healed enough to recognize that he could appreciate the structure that it gave him in the time after the war.

Merlin only knows how many hours he would have spent locked away in his own study going over every single detail of his life and scrutinizing his very existence.

He walked slowly down the grand staircase, letting his forefinger trail along the intricate woodwork and cool metal, his eyes trained on the stair in front of each foot as he stepped down.

He walked through the parlor room and past the locked dinning room into a smaller, makeshift dinning area that Draco and Narcissa had taken to eating their meals in, nothing would ever have them in _that_ room again.

Draco took a seat beside his mother, not looking into her eyes, or even speaking to her, they had little words to say to one another of late, though that could be attributed to the letters they, or rather she, had begun to receive from Lucius Malfoy.

Draco, a few days ago, had noted with a sneer, "It seems the old ways have crumbled at Azkaban, if father, one of the most hated men in the entire Wizarding world, is allowed to write his scorned family instead of wallow in his misery and lost hope"

His mother had not taken kindly to this as she had started to rely on the messages as little tidbits to keep her smiling through the days, knowing her husband was not being tortured or 'treated unjustly'.

Draco held no emotion for the man any longer, yes there had been a point in his life where Draco Malfoy would have, and did, anything for the approval of his father, but now he was a grown man, well almost, and he no longer sought approval from a monster.

Having voiced these opinions to his mother, she gave him such a glare that he was surprised holes had not been burnt through his clothing and skin, possibly even his bones. He had also received a sound yelling at, and it felt horrible to be scolded like a child so they chose their word to each other wisely, settling on little in the end.

His mother sipped her tea and looking longingly at the service door for the house elves. Draco knew her impatient looks were for the morning letters not for her food, which she still barely touched on good days.

It was becoming a chore to look after Narcissa and Draco was certainly worried for her well being while he was away at school.

When the house elf did walk in he carried a silver platter with 3 letters upon it, Narcissa greedily took the letters, cast aside the first two and tore open the third, she skimmed it and then began to read.

My dearest wife,

I cant be sure that you are reading these letters, and I wouldn't blame you if they ended up in the fire, burning, I supposed I will never know because the guards tell us that being high security we are not allowed visitors or letters, even contact of any kind. The thought that I shall never see you makes me feel even worse for what has transpired, but you must look on the bright side, you have Draco and he, being the beneficiary for everything now, will look after you very well. I hope to secure the documents and make everything his like you wished for soon, but I daresay they don't know the word quickly around here. You must make sure that he understands the responsibility that surrounds the position, and the requirements that he must complete. I trust that you will make a fine selection for Draco and-

"Stop. Is this all you do anymore? Read these pathetic letters from a useless man who you will never see again? You know what, I don't care, read them, praise them, live by them, do whatever you bloody want to but Merlin mother, don't drag me into this as well. We were lucky to get out as unscathed as we have, I never want to be a part of _that_ again." He said indicating the letter which represented all that was left of his father.

To his credit he did not rise from the table, but he did reach across and retrieve the toast, refusing to meet his mothers stunned gaze.

She didn't say a word, but set the letter down, albeit reluctantly. And Draco knew she would read it again when he was not around.

She reached for the other two, tearing them open with far less fervor as she had the first. After skimming the first she set it down, the third she only eyed, then held out for him.

He took it carefully and recognized almost immediately that it was from Hogwarts. His school supply list no doubt. So he opened the letter and read lazily, he was correct, the letter contained all the school supplies that he was required to get.

Musing to himself he muttered where he would need to go to get all the things, "Probably need new robes as well…" he muttered then his gaze went unwillingly to his left forearm and he stiffened. No he would make do with last years robes, he didn't want to be in a situation where any person could see his arm, even if they all knew what they would find there.

The truth was, removing the dark mark was something that Draco had wanted practically since he got it, not that he recognized that emotion, he was too set on being the perfect little death eater in training to see the error in his ways. Now, however, he had studied in his spare time ways to removed the mark, but no matter the complicated spells and potions he tries, nothing seems to work.

Narcissa sees her sons gaze fall on his covered left sleeve and immediately thinks of her own, she would have to be a fool to not want it removed but it does not bother her as much as it does her son. She may be grieving but she is not an idiot, she hears her son brewing and muttering incantations before he gives up in a fit of rage almost every night.

"Draco" she commands sharply, "You will be judged with or without the mark, don't be foolish. Get new robes." Then she rose from the table weakly and having already snatched the letter from her husband, she strides from the room, never having touched the food on her plate.

Draco ignores his mothers outburst and butters his toast slowly, eating carefully and thinking all the while about his impending trip to Diagon Alley. Eventually he finished, and having not found a valid reason not to go that very day he walks up to his room to collect a few things, grabs money and the list and steps into the fireplace once more.

"Diagon Alley" he called out and was quickly wished off to the now bustling shopping center that he remembered being desolate and gray, not filled with color beyond a doubt.

Draco was able to keep his hood up from most of the trip, stopping to get books and ingredients for potions and such, he had a decent relationship with the potions master of Diagon Alley, Master Bellior admired Draco's natural talent and his determination in finding a cure for the dark mark. He probably also enjoyed the gallons that Draco spent there.

"Mr. Malfoy, wonderful to see you again, I trust you have been working hard, any progress you wish to speak of?" he asked semi brightly.

Draco shook his head slightly, "I've tested every option there is really, every potion known to wizards I've tried them all. I've written my own, though I'm slightly apprehensive to try it though, I would rather like to keep all my body parts as they are" he drawled slowly.

The man nodded eagerly, "Well I would be pleased to help you with your ingredients, there isn't anything I cant get a hold of."

"That will come in very handy when I'm back at school, would you be willing to send me things there?"

"Yes, yes as long as their aren't too illegal" he said lowly, looking around the room for spies.

Draco fought the urge to roll his eyes and point out that the Ministry had more to worry about then an illegal dragon scale here and there for a 18 year old boy.

Draco handed him the school list as well as a list of his own, then sent the things he had just bought, magically, back to his study/ potion lab.

After speaking with master Bellior for a few minutes about the repercussions of testing unstable potions out on himself Draco ducked back onto the streets. His last stop of the day, Madam Malkin's, to get new robes. He sighed and stepped into the shop, there were two other families already there so he took a seat and opened a book.

"Draco?" A voice asked and he stiffened until he met the brilliant blue eyes of Daphne Greengrass.

"Daphne" he greeted with a nod, she sat next to him.

"My mother mentioned that you were at the ball, but I didn't see you" she said quietly.

Draco nodded, "Yes, mother has been on a 'get Draco married' crusade. I'm afraid yours and Blaise's relationship rendered you useless to her." He said

"Did you see Pansy there?" she asked again in the hushed tones.

Draco nodded swiftly, sure he had seen and spoken to her, but he didn't ever want to _see_ her again.

"She's been worried about your relationship" Daphne said again, in her dull monotone voice.

"She needn't worry. We haven't got a relationship" he said curtly.

Daphne ignored this, "I heard you were going back too" she said.

"Less my choice then my mother and the Ministry's" he said.

"I heard about that too, your community service I mean. Its over now though isn't it?"

"Yes, but I'm still being tracked" he said, not bitterly like he would expect to feel, he just really didn't care.

"My… my sister said she danced with you at the ball, she's not… a consideration is she?" she asked plainly, with a disapproving look at Draco.

Draco now remembered Astoria Greengrass, her wit, her beauty, but he raised an eyebrow at Daphne, "I didn't even know you had a sister until that night, and now you're her protective older sister?" he said.

"No. I don't care about her, I care about Pansy, she's my best friend and she loves you"

"She doesn't know what love it" Draco said harshly, "We never loved one another, she was convenient and I was practically royalty. We used each other"

"She loves you" Daphne said her voice hard. Then she stood up and left the shop without a word.

Draco sighed and returned to his novel before Madam Malkin called him back to stand on the platform, she had him strip off his shirt, "There we are, new school robes, yes?" she said, not recognizing the mark on his arm as he tried to hide it.

Then Astoria Greengrass appeared standing on the platform next to him, she looked bored and he couldn't help but glance at her figure, clad in fine red silks as she spoke to the lady taking measurements.

His left forearm felt heavy all the sudden and he trained his eyes on Madam Malkin's as she took measurements of his chest.

He felt Astoria's eyes on him, felt them burn down his body as she stared at him, he looked over swiftly to find her ogling his chest, he raised an eyebrow and she slide her eyes turning back to the front, her black curls flipping from the gesture.

Madam Malkin, to her credit, only flinched when she saw the dark mark on his arm, she never met his eyes and she was shaking profusely but she did not yell or scream or kick him out.

After he was finished and had waved his things home and he walked out to the front, pulling the sleeves down on his black silk shirt he suddenly felt cool hands grasp his left arm and he froze.

He looked to the side and saw her, her eyes were only on his arm as she pushed the fabric up and revealed the mark to herself, with purpose. He was frozen, there was no on else in the front of the shop but she stood there, she ran her cold finger over the mark carefully, entranced by it. Her head tilted to the side slightly and her cool breath so close to his skin he could feel it fan out along his arm when she breathed out, however faintly it was.

Suddenly he felt sick, that such a beautiful girl would seek this out, this mark of inhumanity and disgusting pasts. He yanked his arm away and her eyes flew to his, a picture of innocence took over her features, "I'm sorry" she said quietly, thought she didn't back away, only slowly let her arm fall to her side again.

His face was blank, he knew that, he was good at blank, he opened his mouth to tell her something rude, something that would chase her away, and keep her far, far away from him and his… diseased mind, But he couldn't form the words.

With his silence she gained confidence and rested her hand over his now covered arm, gently she looked deep into his eyes and leaned forward slightly, curiously, "Can I see it again?" this took him off guard and he almost lost his composure completely but instead he remained still as a statue, so she continued, "I didn't mean to startle you before. So?" she prodded but made no move to try and force him into showing her like before.

Draco took in the sight of her, what a strange girl she was, reading books out of order (much like he did), declining dances with him, her snarky attitude at the ball, and now this? Trying to see the dark mark on one of the most disgusting people in all of England. But the only coherent thought that he had that was not centered around self loathing was _she's so beautiful. _

It wasn't that Astoria Greengrass was drop dead gorgeous, which would usually have been a criteria if you even wanted to speak to a Malfoy (excluding Pansy of course). No, Astoria was small, delicate and short, she looked closer to frail then physically and emotionally strong. But she was feisty, and that drew Draco in faster then anything else. She captured his interest, however little he had left in him since the war, and she continued to surprise him. That was what was so beautiful about her, she was untainted.

Yes, he knew she was beautiful, and that made it all the worse that she was so freaking adamant about seeing his dark mark. Once again the sick feeling churned deep in his stomach and he felt even closer to being physically ill.

How could he respond, should he show her the mark? No, how could he even think to corrupt such an innocent soul as his father had once done to him. No Draco couldn't even entertain the idea of this form of perfection ever having to bear his burden, or see what a monster he was, because it would infect her too, and that was an unbearable thought for Draco Malfoy.

"I'm _poison_" he whispered harshly and hoarsely as he glided past her and advanced from the store faster then he usually moved, eager to leave and never have to look into her penetrating green orbs again, for fear of giving in to her every whim.

As Draco stalked back to his reclusive quarters, not so much as uttering a word to his stunned mother, he made a promise to himself, _he would not taint Astoria Greengrass with himself, poison. _


	5. Anna's Visit

**Wow, I am so sorry for how long this has taken! I swear I'll update tomorrow or sometime really soon to make up for it.**

**Ok, this chapter is in need of a Warning, so here goes.**

**Warning: LEMON! (My first attempt- so probably terrible)**

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><p>As quickly as his father's letters started, they stopped altogether. Draco didn't know what caused the dramatic end to the letters, just that the last one he sent contained the forms in which he, Draco, was named as the head of the Malfoy household.<p>

To say that the transfer of power had been anticlimactic would be an understatement. Draco sat with his mother, they both signed the forms, they glowed blue momentarily and vanished. That was it, the great inheritance of the Malfoy name.

Narcissa was taking the lack of contact rather well considering her dependence upon them mere days before they stopped. Thought this could be accounted for by her diligent work to find the perfect pureblood bride for Draco.

This hadn't gone unnoticed by Draco who was often graced with finding letters strewn about the house from various heads of households regarding him meeting their daughters. He was unnerved one day to find a familiar family crest donning a letter addressed to his mother, he searched in vain for the letter from Mrs. Greengrass but gave up quickly, knowing that his mother would never tell him where she had hidden it or what it had said.

The worry that he would be called down one day and find himself in the company of Astoria Greengrass nagged in the back of his brain for days, and he became utterly suspicious of his mothers letters with Mrs. Greengrass. But, being a Pureblood and a Malfoy, he kept his mouth shut and his eyes keen.

Apparently his eyes were failing him because that is exactly what happened the Thursday following his Saturday trip into Diagon Alley. Well the girl was perhaps different, but the loathing he felt towards her almost made him wish Astoria was the one greeting his mother in the great hall instead of her.

Anna DeCrane. Of course.

How had he not seen this coming, she snaked her way into his mothers mind and she was going to trick her all the way down the aisle. He admired her conniving and recognized her true Slytherin roots, but it didn't make him like her any more.

"Pokey, go fetch Draco please" Narcissa addressed the house elf without glancing down at him, instead kissing Anna's cheeks and leading her into the sitting room she had designated for this very afternoon tea.

It was 2 o'clock and Draco had heard Anna's entrance, he was furious that his mother would take advantage of their afternoon tea to invite such a sleazy girl into their home. _His home_.

Nevertheless he walked down the grand staircase and into the sitting room, making sure to not look surprised when he saw Anna, who rose and gave him a sly grin behind his mothers back.

"Anna, what a pleasure, I haven't seen you since St. Mungos." He stated as they all took their seats, Draco next to his mother on a light blue sofa and Anna across from them.

"Yes, its been different without you, a strange environment" she said, keeping her voice light and tinkling, a strangely attractive voice, too bad it was faked, "You don't suppose you were entertaining the idea of returning any time soon?"

"Oh no, no Draco will be off to Hogwarts to finish his schooling properly in a few weeks, a shame really, you two have just started to talk too" Narcissa said, sitting ridged on the couch, pretending to be unaware of her sons growing wrath.

"Yes, what a shame" Draco drawled out slowly, raising his cup to his lips and taking a sip, his eyes locked on his mothers.

"Oh, well why don't you tell us about your family Anna" Narcissa prompted, she was probably taking notes with a Quick Quill behind the couch, Draco thought viciously.

Anna smiled fondly, "Father works for the Ministry, he's in charge of the Department of International Wizarding Relations, he works with other countries ministries basically. And Mother stays at home with my siblings. I've got two younger brothers, twins, going into their 5th year at Hogwarts actually"

"Lovely, I don't recall seeing them at the Greengrass Ball?" Narcissa said with a pleasant smile on her face, sipping at her tea as well.

"Oh, no they weren't in attendance, minor case of Dragon Pox I'm afraid, mother and I have been staying elsewhere so that we don't catch it you see" she said, this time her face lit up with a sweet but sharp smile, one that had even Draco captivated, if only for a second.

He blinked a few times, quickly clearing the haze that overtook him momentarily. She wasn't that attractive, sure she had a killer body and long blond hair that would feel wonderful to tangle his hands into, but she was just so repulsive on the inside, he couldn't even bare to think about her that way… Could he?

"-Isn't that right Draco?"

"Hmm? Oh yes, of course" he said, realizing he had spaced out of the conversation, not knowing what he was agreeing to in the slightest.

Anna rose and gave him a brilliant smile and Narcissa gave him and look, "Well darling?"

"Sorry?" he asked weakly, suddenly fearing what he had just inadvertently agreed to.

"The walk Draco, go show her the grounds. Merlin you need to listen more carefully" she said slowly her voice strained with impatience.

Draco stood up slowly, not wanting to walk around the grounds with Anna at all, in fact he would rather battle a hippogriff with his hands tied behind his back blindfolded then show the snake of a girl around his manors grounds.

Nevertheless he held out his arm and she slipped hers through it, she kept her voice and steps dainty until they were outside the house and far enough that Narcissa couldn't hear a thing. Then she looked up at him with seduction written all over her face.

He ignored the way she was looking at him, and his sudden desire to shag her, it had been entirely too long since he had a decent (or any) shag, and it was becoming painfully aware to him from the tightening in his pants.

Anna noticed too apparently because she let her hand cup his length through his pants and squeeze in a teasing manner. Draco let out an involuntarily groan, his eyes traveling to the back of his head for a second before he threw whatever had previously been in his mind out of the window, this was happening and it was happening now.

He picked up his pace, dragging Anna along a hidden path and into a more secret and somewhat private area of the gardens that had a small fountain and large willow trees that created the perfect canopy for what he had in mind. There were hedges that blocked the view from the terraces of the manor into the small area and it was relatively quite other than the trickle of the water in the fountain.

Her lips found his and they kissed roughly, not giving a care for the feeling, just needing the contact and progression. His tongue shoved its way into her mouth and swirled around, and his hands found the different places on her body, first her stomach, her sides and her breasts, then down to her thighs and up into her wet center. His hands traveled back up to her breasts and cupped them harshly, finding the nipple already erect through her robes.

Roughly he shoved her against the tree and started to do away with the layers keeping her breasts away from his mouth. Getting impatient he tore away the rest of the top shirt and took in the sight of her red lace clad breasts bobbing slightly in front of him.

Taking only a minute to appreciate them he ripped the bra off as well, tossing it carelessly away, not even registering the plunk as it landed in the fountain. He took each breast in his hands and flicked his thumb over the nipple hard.

Anna's moans drove him to take the right nipple into his mouth and suck hard, taking breaks to roughly bite down then soothe with his hot tongue. His hand was kneading the left breast and Anna had arched into him and was near screaming.

He pulled away briefly to cast a silencing charm around them, so that the house elves didn't disturb their… fun?

The hand that had previously held her breast moved down her fit body and into her knickers, finding her clit easily he started to rub it in circles harshly, and she clutched onto him, shaking with pleasure and screaming his name, he slipped two fingers into her folds and slammed them into her as hard as he could, he repeated this fast for less then 30 seconds before he felt her walls clamping around his fingers and she pulled him close, latching her mouth onto his again.

They kissed sloppily and without a care, as she writhed between him and the great willow, and he swallowed her screams of pleasure. When she was finished and had regained her breath she sank to her knees this time forcing him to lean against the tree, his chest still covered with a dark gray shirt.

Her fingers undid his belt with practiced expertise and she looked up at him from under her eye lashes, this made him grow impossibly harder as he kicked off his trousers and boxers and her hand found his shaft.

She started to work him meticulously, sliding her hand up and down, licking up his shaft once to coat it in wetness so she could use her hands more effectively. Eventually she included her breasts, pressing them together around him and letting him slide between them with his precum and her thin coat of saliva as the only lubricant.

Draco felt closer to the edge now but it wasn't until Anna took him in her mouth and started to bob her head, keeping her eyes on his face the whole time that he felt himself start to unravel.

She continued her ministrations, sliding up and down his shaft, occasionally taking as much as she could before chocking and having to moved back, then working the head with care, swirling her slick tongue around it and all the way along his shaft.

He was so close when she started to massage his balls and he groaned one final groan and came into her mouth, Anna, the slag that she was, swallowed it all and made a show of it as well. On any normal day Draco would have been less then impressed but this little show she was putting on just helped to get him hard all over again.

She grinned up at him slyly as he tried to control his breathing while also control his continued raging hard on. He groaned again as she rose slowly and pushed her body against his, but he changed their positions, spinning her around so that her back was against the tree again.

He lifted her right leg and shoved himself into her hot wetness, not giving her any time to prepare for his length. They both moaned as he filled her to the hilt and she screamed when he started to move inside her. He didn't give her any time to adjust to his length and thickness, and honestly he was _huge_.

Instead he thrusted into her as her hands wound around his neck and they created a sloppy but hard rhythm with their hips, crashing together and moaning, then pulling apart. Repeated until they were both close to screaming.

It wasn't enough, so he gripped her hips tightly and spun her around, pulling completely out of her for a second, "Hands on the tree, stick out your arse" he demanded savagely. He let his hand collide with her ass once, leaving a hard red mark that was shaped somewhat like his hand.

Anna complied and Draco plunged into her from behind, griping her hips as he drove faster and harder then even before. From the sounds she was making this was a good position for the both of them, so he deiced to ride it out this way. He started to thrust harder on her commands, driving deeper into her with every thrust. He shut his eyes tightly and began to groan with the increasing speed.

It was hot and he was approaching the edge quickly, so he reached between them to find her swollen clit, as soon as he touched it she screamed out and orgasmed around him, the feeling of her walls clenching around him made Draco grit his teeth.

He fucked her through her orgasm until she was jelly in his arms before he let himself cum into her, pumping until he was finished and groaning loudly as he did so, then he stepped back, sliding himself out of her and trying to control his breathing.

Anna kept a tight grip on his shoulders and he made no move to pry her off, simply because he was too tried to bother with her complaints. He was leaning over her against the tree and she latched onto her so she didn't slide to the ground as she caught her breath and tried to get her limbs to work again.

They didn't say a word as they cleaned themselves with magic and repaired torn and soaking wet clothing, redressing and fixing appearances as best as they could manage. Anna was still flushed and grinning and Draco's usually impeccably crisp clothing was wrinkled and his hair was disorientated. He didn't bother with either, opting instead to hide from his mother until he was showered and changed.

As they walked back to the house Draco let Anna grip his arm, knowing what it looked like and what is probably felt like for her, but he just didn't have the energy to tell her off. He prayed to god that his mother didn't see them walking into the house this way or she would surely have his head.

He walked her to the door and didn't say a word to her as she left, she didn't bother trying to get him to speak, and she was too busy wearing her satisfied and very smug grin. The grin that before had turned Draco on now made him feel sick to his stomach.

_What had he done_? At first he wanted to roll his eyes and shrug it off, it was just a shag. Who cares?

Well there were many things that went through Draco's mind; his mother's wrath if she were ever to find out, Anna's almost guaranteed newfound obsession, and the strangest of them all, his guilt.

Draco hadn't the faintest idea why he felt guilty, Anna had thrown herself at him, and it wasn't his fault for shagging a girl so desperate that she allowed him to not say a word to her afterward.

Draco just prayed that this was the end of Anna; he knew of course, that it could only get worse from where it was. He sighed and pulled his hand through his hair, and then overcome with felling completely dirty, he walked up the stairs to shower and possible lock himself away to ponder his newfound guilt.

Was it really guilt or fear? No, he was not afraid of the petite blonde that had successfully seduced him. She would fear him if she had any inclination that any of that would ever happen again. No, it was guilt. That much he was sure of, the reason behind this newfound and suspiciously mysterious guilt he had no idea of. And that was fine with him, so he chose to ignore it and move on.

He passed the house elf in the hallway, who stared at him with wide eyes, Draco didn't bother looking but the house elf knew that he couldn't say anything to Miss Narcissa… unless she asked that is.

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><p><strong>Ok, how terrible was the Lemon?<strong>


	6. Reacquainted With Hogwarts

"You'll write Draco" his mother commanded sharply, "Like you were in first year again, yes?" this time it was more begging.

Draco would have been more understanding if this had not been the hundredth time she had brought it up, or if they were not standing at the platform while the train threatened to leave without him.

As it was, he was apprehensive at best about returning to Hogwarts and gave his mother an eye roll, "Of course mother, I'll write you _too_ much" he said and stooped to kiss her cheek.

Then he turned on his heel and boarded the train. The last few weeks of summer had gone far too quickly. His days were filled with escaping the many women his mother tried to throw at him and his nights spent over a scalding cauldron, praying for the cure for his constant reminder to hate himself.

Anna had become somewhat of a pest, something like a fly lazily buzzing around his head and bothering him endlessly. Narcissa absolutely loved her and insisted that she come over for dinner often, which led to her and Draco being shoved together for little walks afterwards.

And while Anna was more than willing to repeat their previous… fun… Draco was adamant that she _keep her bloody hands to herself_. This did nothing to deter the blond, who took no hints that he was utterly uninterested.

His mother even went so far as to invite her to their Christmas celebrations, and now they must actually have one. Shame, Draco was rather fond of his own tradition, get shit wasted and brood. Ahh, that's rather depressing isn't it?

"Draco!" the blob with brown hair came at him so fast he only had time to turn before she was wrapped around his middle, squeezing like her life depended on it. Draco didn't respond, but cleared his throat.

Pansy backed away and grinned up at him, "Come on, we've got a compartment down here" she took his hand and dragged, he was reluctant to follow but put up no challenge to her.

People stared as he went by, with loathing clear in their eyes. Draco sighed, he didn't care that people thought that he was a monster because he was a monster. And no matter what other people thought, he was sure that he hated himself more than they ever could.

"Who do they think they are, staring at you like that?" pansy demanded shrilly, glaring at a 5th years boy who scurried away as soon as her frightening gaze rested on him.

Draco untangled himself from Pansy, "Leave it Pansy" he said.

"What? Your going to let them get away with hating you like that?" she demanded her hands on her hips.

Draco shrugged and turned, crashing into a girl, the girl started to fall and he caught her, accidently crushing her to his sculpted chest in the process. When he pulled back, shock crossed his face but he drawled out before he could remember to stay away from her, "Back for more Greengrass, I know my dancing was phenomenal but all you need to do is ask"

She jerked away from him and glared, rubbing her elbow a little, "Do you have a personality disorder Malfoy?" she hissed.

Pansy stepped up, jealousy clear in her dirty brown eyes, "What do you want?" she demanded of Astoria.

Astoria rolled her eyes, "Certainly not to fall on him, don't worry Parkinson you've got him locked nice and tight" she said, cooing like she was reassuring Pansy, which in turn infuriated her.

Pansy stomped her foot and started to throw a fit and Astoria rolled her eyes again, flipped her hair back nonchalantly and drifted off towards a different compartment.

Draco walked the short distance to where Daphne, Theodore and Blaise were sitting. He walked in and sat down, glancing briefly at the people in the compartment. Pansy followed shortly and tried to squeeze in next to Draco then she glared at Daphne, "Your sister is a stupid bitch" she said.

Draco stiffened slightly but shook it off, looking instead for Daphne to argue and defend her gorgeous and engaging sister, but she didn't, "Oh Merlin, What has she done this time?" she droned.

"She was practically humped Draco in the hall, it was-"

Draco gave her a scathing look stopping her mid sentence, "She tripped and I caught her. End of story" he rolled his eyes and muttered something alone the line of 'girls are so dramatic' earning a half smirk from Blaise who was promptly hit by Daphne.

Theo however was staring outside the compartment, into another one. Draco couldn't be bothered enough to see who captured his attention but guessed it was one of the seventh year Ravenclaws he used to go on about.

Pansy and Daphne had stopped their gossip and Pansy turned to Draco, putting her hand on his arm, "We didn't see enough of each other over the summer" she pouted, "I missed you" she leaned in for a kiss but Draco scooted away, shaking her hand off his arm as well.

Pansy looked heart broken and turned away sniffing, the others in the compartment looked awkwardly away and started conversations of their own.

By the time the train had arrived Draco was a nervous wreck, he couldn't ignore the comments or the looks he was receiving from everyone in the school on the train and he knew it would only get worse inside the great hall.

Nevertheless he stood, elegant as ever and entered the massive hall with all the others, taking a seat between Blaise and Nott, Pansy refused to sit next to him and was still pouting from their little tiff on the train. So dramatic.

Once everyone had entered the great hall and settled in Professor McGonagall stood up and walked to the front, raising her hands for silence she received it instantly.

"Now is a time that we can truly welcome you students back to Hogwarts. The war is over and our hearts our mending, the school received countless blows and has been fully restored to its former glory, and now we can truly honor your educations. It will be hard work to make up for the horrendous education that you received last year and we will be here for you to make that transition. It is time to make amends and time to open our hearts and minds to learning. Welcome back to Hogwarts" she smiled and there was a loud cheering, Pansy rolled her eyes but clapped and Draco clapped softly.

The sorting hat was set out and it cleared its throat then began to sing merrily,

"_There's nothing hidden in your head_

_The Sorting Hat can't see, _

_So try me on and I will tell you _

_Where you ought to be. _

_You might belong in Gryffindor, _

_Where dwell the brave at heart,_

_Their daring, nerve ,and chivalry_

_Set Gryffindors apart; _

_You might belong in Hufflepuff, _

_Where they are just and loyal, _

_Those patient Hufflepuffs are true_

_And unafraid of toil; _

_Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,_

_if you've a ready mind, _

_Where those of wit and learning, _

_Will always find their kind; _

_Or perhaps in Slytherin _

_You'll make your real friends, _

_Those cunning folks use any means_

_To achieve their ends. _

_The separation of war is over_

_The time to sort grows near_

_But unity is scarce_

_Even with nothing left to fear_

_Yes, yes, sort I will_

_But what once was divided_

_Needs to grown stronger_

_No longer one-sided"_

"What?" Pansy screeched softly, "It wants us to be friends with them? Absolutely not" she said turning her pug nose up, thinking about the rather funny remark Astoria had made when they first met brought a smirk to Draco's face as he turned slightly to look for her at the Ravenclaw table.

He spotted her and almost instantly she turned to look his way, like the feeling of his eyes on her tipped her off, but Draco was able to look down before she actually met his eyes with her green ones that practically have him on his knees in front of her. Metaphorically speaking of course, Malfoy's kneel to no one.

Draco scarcely listened to the sorting, clapping only when his tablemates were joined with a new first year, looking terrified and awed at the same time. He drummed his fingers along the dark wood and had to fight himself to keep his eyes trained on the table instead of wandering in a certain dark haired beauty's direction, fearing that she would actually catch him this time.

Stop. He scolded himself. Why her? Why did you have to obsess over the most untainted Pure-blood?

He had no right to taint her, no right to take away the innocence she didn't even know she possessed, he shuddered when he remembered her fascination with his arm, embroidered forever with his mistakes and regrets.

Most people get to move on and dispose of reminders of their pasts, not Draco, he was afraid to admit that his dark mark would be there forever, he was terrified that he would have to spend his life staring down at the thing that caused him so much pain and despair and now self hatred.

His fingers twitched to roll the sleeve up and stare at the mark until he could throw up, needing to purge his body in some way on the evil that was marked on him. The evil that was a part of him. He was evil.

By the time the food appeared he was so deep in his self hatred he could hardly look at the food, let alone scarf it down like the rest of the great hall. He ate, for show mostly, so as not to draw attention to himself.

Little did he know a certain dark haired girl watched him poke around at the food and sighed to herself softly, wondering idly why he loved to torture himself so much.

When the feast ended he was the first to rise, looking down at his friends who all stared up at him, "I'll be up soon" he said shortly and walked briskly to the great doors, pushing them open he left in the throng of students exiting, but broke from the pack, moving with practice to a place that he knew would be empty. To a place that he could be alone, just like he wanted.

Wasn't that what he wanted? Why he was pushing her away? Why he pushed everyone away? To be alone, truly alone?

Possibly not, because the thought of being alone nearly forced him to stop walking. No, he didn't want to be alone, but he wanted to hate himself alone, and that's what he was going to do now, hate himself openly. Completely alone.

He stopped suddenly, staring at the empty wall for nearly 5 minutes before he could pinpoint what he actually wanted.

It was simple really.

_I want to be utterly alone with myself. _

_I want to be utterly alone with myself._

_I want to be utterly alone with myself._

The ornate door that haunts his memories appeared, expanding across the wall quietly and swiftly until it spanned the whole height of the wall and nearly two arm spans of Draco's.

He strode forward and pulled the door open, stepped in and gasped.

The room was medium sized, but appeared to go one forever, the mirrors that covered the length of every wall forced him to look at himself and never escape anything. It was perfect.

Here he could think without worrying.

He slide down the side of one wall, his knees brought to his chest as he remembered clearly like it was his first day again, his head lurched forward and rested in the palm of his hands and he sat for nearly an hour letting the memories wash over him numbly before rising and slipping down to the dungeons to get some sleep.


	7. Agitation

**Ok, here is chapter 7: Agitation **

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><p><em>Dear Mother, <em>

_I promised to write didn't I? The train ride and sorting was uneventful, the sorting hat wants unity within the four houses, wanting to stop any other wars that could be in the making probably. People sit where they want to at breakfast and the common rooms are frequented by people from other houses often. Slytherin is probably the most resistant to change and I don't say anything but really I don't think its such a bad idea. Slytherin poisoned many peoples minds into believing muggle borns were evil scum, it wasn't just a Pure-blood concept. _

_Classes start today, double potions to begin, with the Ravenclaws. That should be interesting. I don't dread going to potions, which I'm surprised about, because what student is excited about classes? I guess I'm rather hoping that Slughorn and the other teachers don't see me and think instantly that I'm evil. _

_I'm glad I can write to you mother, I miss you. I hope you are doing well and aren't too lonely, please keep in contact with me or I'll worry too much. Hogwarts is ok, people see me and hate me, they glare and they whisper, they shout things, but its ok. Better then I thought, then I deserve. _

_Always__,__ your son,_

_Draco._

Draco watched as his sleek eagle owl flew from sight, he leaned over the railing more and clutched then time table of his classes in his hands. When Mercury, his owl, was finally just a speck in the distance he turned and walked to his class, slowing slightly when he realized that he was somewhat early.

He entered the class and kept his eyes down, not in fear. Well only partially in fear, the other was the fact that he could _feel_ Astoria Greengrass in the room and he wanted nothing more then to stay away from her.

He sat in a desk near the back corner of the room, easy for him to see the professor but not quite as easy for him to see Draco, he also noted that he had a clear sight of Astoria from his seat, for now she sat alone.

Draco sat alone as well, he pulled his textbook from his bag and leafed through it aimlessly, taking note of any potion that claimed to remove marks or blemishes, no matter how small. He had quickly trained himself to strengthen and change potions to fit his needs and was still hell bent on getting rid of his dark mark.

Suddenly the room was filled and everyone was talking softly, then Slughorn walked out with a grin on his face, "Hello students!"

There was a low murmur of, "Hello professor" and Slughorn was mighty pleased.

"I thought we could kick off the year with a little potion competition, eh? Everyone will work by themselves, yes sorry, sorry, and the winner gets- well you'll just have to see, eh?"

Everyone moaned and prepared their own cauldrons, waiting for further instructions.

"Alright, and since your all so pleased to be here" he laughed at his own joke, "We'll be making and Elixir to Induce Euphoria! Turn to page 109 and GO!" he clapped and everyone set off brewing their potions clumsily.

Draco sat for a minute reading the recipe, frowning when he came across something that seemed a hair off, or completely wrong.

He rose slowly and got his ingredients, and other ones as well. He walked back to the back of the classroom and stirred his potion constantly, while his classmates took breaks where the book told them too.

Draco sighed, if he stopped stirring the potion would collect in some areas and not be cohesive throughout. Obviously.

He rolled his eyes and continued to work in silence. Even so, he caught himself glancing up and to the right to check on Astoria every once in a while, feeling anger pit in his stomach whenever he realized what he was doing.

At one point she was so frustrated she threw something random in the potion, then regretting it, so she tried to fish it out, nearly singeing her robes in her haste. It was quite amusing actually.

He smirked in her direction and went back to work, nearly finished all he had to do was… drop in 3 castor beans?

No, no not 3, that would change the whole potion! 2 would be enough, especially since they were rather large.

He threw them in and stirred until the potion turned to appropriate shade of sunny yellow, then he took it off the heat and set it down. He waved away the mess he had made and took his seat again.

"Your not done, are you?" Nott demanded from his cauldron a desk away from Draco. His own cauldron was emitting a column of thick black smoke causing Nott to cough every few minutes of trying to control it.

He looked up at his friend and smirked, "Having a bit of trouble I see Nott"

"Shove it Malfoy, yours is probably rubbish anyway" with that he turned back to his desk, but not before attracting the attention of Slughorn, who now made his way over to their corner.

He peered into Nott's cauldron and inched away, then glanced at Draco, and seeing him just sitting put a frown on his face, "Mr. Malfoy, have you finished the assignment?" he asked, not expecting the answer to be yes.

"Yes, Professor" Draco said, tilting the cauldron so Slughorn could see better.

"My word! Its perfect, 20 points to Slytherin for superb brewing skill, you might have a career ahead of you my boy"

Draco didn't have anything to say to that so he simply nodded, noting that success in Slughorn's book seemed to overrule any misdoings on his part. The man waddled away still glancing back at Draco with an awed expression.

Perhaps if he were to impress the man enough he would be invited to the Slug Club (cringe) and possibly get ideas for removing the mark… ah everything came back to the mark.

It was the single thing that Draco Malfoy strived towards, and being a Slytherin he did not give up easily, and would do just about anything to get what he desired.

Slughorn would see him as a prodigy before the end of the month and Draco would have an invitation to the Christmas Ball. A smirk made its way onto his face, it felt good to have something to work towards.

Suddenly there was shout of surprise and a loud thunk. Draco turned and saw nothing but people crouching down, it was not until he heard, "Astoria?" repeated over and over that he made an move.

He stood and strode over, taking in her passed out state, Slughorn ran over, "What happened? What happened?" he demanded

The gangly boy that was sharing a table with Astoria spoke up, "She accidently got some of the essence of wormwood powder near her face and inhaled it"

Draco took in a deep breath, that was not good. He saw what the boy was doing to her anyway, he was getting too close with the powder, he was trying to make a move on her and actually ended up hurting her. Idiot.

Slughorn met his eyes momentarily, "Mr. Malfoy take Mrs. Greengrass to the hospital wing. Now please!"

Draco was shocked, and it was splashed across his face, but he stooped and scooped her up into his arms like she was a twig, then set out down the halls.

It was hard not to enjoy it, she fit so perfectly in his arms, and he knew that she was unconscious because she was injured but she still looked so peaceful and beautiful that he couldn't help but smile down at her.

A smile, not a smirk. It seemed that Astoria Greengrass was the only person in the world that made him smile for real right now.

He entered the hospital wing and-

"Mr. Malfoy! What is this?" Madam Pomfrey asked as Draco lay Astoria down gently on a bed.

"She inhaled Wormwood powder in potions."

"Ah!" she said and bustled about getting healing potions from the cupboards and pouring them down Astoria's mouth.

She coughed eventually and sat up, Draco helped her get into a sitting position as she hacked away.

Madam Pomfrey had to see to another student so they were completely alone.

"Wh- what- ha-happened" she hacked

"Rogers blew Wormwood into your face in his bumbling effort to ask you out" Draco said simply, no teasing or anger or anything. Just simple fact.

And she looked infuriated, "What are you on about? He's my friend"

Draco smirked, "My, my he was friendly then, does he treat all his 'friends' like that?"

"You act all innocent, don't bother thinking that people don't know about your escapades" she spat at him.

That made him raise his eyebrows down at her, "Who said I was hiding them?"

She shrugged pretending to be calm, still pissed as hell, "If I were shagging Pansy Parkinson I would keep it a secret too"

Draco narrowed his eyes, "I'm not shagging Parkinson." He said shortly.

"Ah? Acquired a new flavor of the week then Malfoy? I pity the girl that has to wake up to you knowing they made the biggest mistake of their life when they let you into their beds!" she screamed.

"At least I have beds to hop into Greengrass, the only person that would want you in their bed would be Rogers and we all know he's desperate for any form of contact" he said coldly

Astoria held back her tears rather well, "You're a slimy git Malfoy, a stupid toe-rag, a waste of space!" she ranted

"Keep going" he said harshly his eyes glinting cold but his demeanor not threatened.

"Your just a worthless little failed death eater, couldn't even please-"

But she stopped when she saw the look on his face, it wasn't wrath, no, it was worse then that to Astoria, it was a look of twisted self hatred and pain. She instantly felt bad for what she said and wished more than anything that she could take it back, but it was out there and it wasn't coming back.

His eyes flickered to his left forearm and she wanted nothing more then to reach out and grab hold of him, keeping him there with her, even if he was just fighting with her, it was better then him hating himself and being so alone.

But he turned on his heel and left, and she didn't call after him. Not a word, or a sound. But the second that the door slammed hot tears ran down her face as she hastily tried to rub them away.

Draco made his way to the common room because classes were all over, in fact he had missed dinner as well, passing a familiar girl on the stairway, she was wearing Ravenclaw colors and he stopped and turned to her, staring at her face.

She giggled and bit her lip, looking into his eyes, "Hi Draco" she murmured gently.

"Hey" he responded, "Going back to your common room?" he asked slyly.

"Why, want to join me?" she asked, a light filling her eyes.

"I'd be more interested in your dorm room" he said, lowing his voice so that it sounded sexy and gravelly.

She grabbed his hand and pulled him through the halls, they reached the doorknob and it posed a question, "All about, but cannot be seen, Can be captured, cannot be held, No throat, but can be heard. What am I?"

She giggled as looked up at him, he was thinking hard about it, and it was frustrating him, "Are you going to answer?" he said, nipping at her throat.

"Wind" she said to the knob, and pulled Draco through the open door and up to her room.

As soon as the door shut and the coast was clear he had her pinned to the wall, his hands were everywhere at once, her flat stomach and her arms, her sides, traveling up and down. Then her thighs as he lifted her to wrap her legs around his waist, then they traveled up to her breast, cupping them before massaging the nipple through all the unnecessary fabric.

All the while their tongues massaged each other, moaning into each others mouths, she was a good kisser and he was very aroused.

He leaned back to let her pull his shirt over his head and he undid her robes, dropping them to the ground as she stood in nothing but her skirt.

She pushed him back to her bed and climbed on top of him, pulling her skirt off in the process and his hands traveled back to her breasts, puling the cups on her bra down just below them so he could suck and tease as much as he wanted to.

Their lips crashed back together and she plunged her hand into his boxers, where had his pants gone? Who cares?

It felt good to forget being a monster and just relish in all the feelings that sex provided.

He turned them over and found her clit easily, rubbing it just how he knew she would like it and she mewled in approval, yelling and scratching his back.

He slid her panties out of the way and pushed off his boxers completely, then he thrust into her and she yelled. Luckily they had placed a silencing charm on the room so they could be as loud and they wanted to be.

The rhythm was not set and they were sporadic with their hips meeting, Draco felt closer and closer until she finally took his balls in her hand and started to rub them.

He swore loudly and came into her, thrusting harder throughout as she also had her release.

He lay there for a moment, hovering over her and breathing heavily, then she reached up and kissed him slowly and wiggled out from under him, pushing him down and she drew the curtains around them, falling asleep on his chest.

Draco didn't know if he wanted to spend the night in her room, he couldn't even remember her name and that made him feel like somewhat a douche bag. But he didn't want to be alone either. No, he couldn't be alone.

So he let the girl drape herself over him and fell asleep with her there, mentally reminding himself to wake up in time to get out before she woke as well.


	8. The Importance of Waffles

**Sorry it took so long... I sort of lost this story for a while... I'm a few chapters ahead and I'm realizing that its getting rather fluffy... :/**

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><p>It was five am when he woke up, completely naked, in her bed. He sighed and untangled himself from her limbs. She didn't wake up so he proceeded to gather his things, redressing and left a quick note for her.<p>

_Thanks for last night, it was brilliant._

He couldn't leave that, it was degrading. So he vanished the note and walked out of the dorm room, shutting the door slowly he heard voices. He made sure to be absolutely silent as he listened to the voiced, straining to hear them from the common room.

"We're so glad your alright Tori, although I heard that it was _Dawson_ that got the powder on you, aren't you angry?"

"No, it was an accident, besides they just let me out of the hospital wing, I might as well live my life, right? No sense in holding old grudges" she said cheerily, and Draco could just imagine the way her eyes lit up with her tone as she lounged on the couches.

Her friends laughed and Draco sighed, it didn't look like they were going to leave anytime soon so he would just have to buck up and walk out of the common room.

He knew he looked like sex right now, plain and simple. His hair was ruffled, his clothes wrinkled and his face was probably still flushed from post-sex glow. He knew how this look effected girls generally and decided that he had to just go for it. He sighed again and walked down the stairs.

The girls all looked up towards the girls staircase and each and everyone of their mouths dropped open, that is except Astoria.

She was sitting with Nancy something or other, Heather Pellet and Megan Gould. Each girl turned bright red and blinked, then the chubby one, Megan spoke up, "Oi, what are you doing here?"

"What does it look like I'm doing Gould, _leaving_" he said tartly, purposely walking slowly through the room to regain at least some of his dignity. Not that he tried to hide his escapades through the castle, he just didn't fancy running out of the room like a douche.

Astoria felt a lump in her throat, she should be giving him hell for screwing a girl and leaving her right then but all she could do was nearly choke on her breaths when she opened her mouth so she opted to stay silent.

He couldn't look into her eyes, so she knew he was still angry from their conversation earlier. Was she the reason he found the first available girl and shagged her senseless?

That hurt. Badly.

"Wait, Malfoy" she calls, finally finding her voice.

He grits his teeth and turns to her, "Sod off Greengrass I'm tired, and in no mood for your stupid, childish games" he shot at her and turned and left the common room.

Astoria slumped into her chair viably and her friends looked strangely at her, "Who do you think he was with?" she asked quietly, not really wanting to know the answer, because she hated the leggy blond (she just knew that was his type, damn it) with a passion.

"Oh gosh, it was from the Sixth year dorm right, not Melanie, she has that Hufflepuff boyfriend" Nancy said, excited to have new gossip to spread about the castle within the next few hours.

"Right. So that leaves Amber and Sally… but ugh who would shag Sally, it must have been Amber" Megan said.

"She's lucky" Heather said, "He's practically sex on legs. It makes me want sex, preferable with him, every time I see him" she said, smirking and biting her plump lips.

Astoria didn't listen to her friends gossip about the very, very recent hoop up between Draco Malfoy and (possibly/ probably) Amber Salinas.

Astoria suddenly found herself comparing Amber to herself. Amber was dirty blond and giggly, Astoria had jet black hair and smirked (much like Malfoy). Astoria also compared their bodies, of course she was right about the leggy part, Amber had legs that just didn't end, whereas Astoria's left much to be desired. It was no doubt that Amber had a huge rack, Astoria glanced down at her own B cup breasts. She made a face and Megan laughed, "Tori why are you scowling at your boobs?"

The others giggled too and Astoria cracked a smile, albeit a fake one.

They chatted more about the goings on in Hogwarts before Heather giggled and looked at Astoria, "You know Dawson has it bad for you right?"

"What? Your crazy, we're mates" she dismissed easily, waving her hands a little.

"Oh yeah? Then why did he beg me to make sure you didn't hate him before he asked you to Hogsmead with him this weekend, huh?" she said raising her eyebrow in a challenge.

"Wh- really?" Astoria asked baffled. She never thought about Dawson that way, but… no they were mates, he wasn't her type anyway. He wasn't Draco.

WHAT? where the bloody hell did that come from? No, absolutely not, she absolutely did not fancy Draco Malfoy. No, no, NO.

Ok, lets be honest, she knew she had fancied him for a while, this was just her first mental acknowledgment of the vastness of that Fancying.

"Oh look! She's blushing, she must like him, hmm Tori, do you fancy Dawson?" Nancy pried.

"No! we're mates" she said heatedly, she started to tremble, what was she going to do, she fancied Draco Malfoy.

But really what girl wouldn't fancy him? Its just like a normal little crush or whatever, he saved her its that weird Muggle complex, hero something.

Yeah, for sure. She sighed and looked at her friends again, they were staring at her expectantly.

"Well?" Megan demanded

"Well what?" she said harshly, sending her a withering glare.

"Well are you going to go with him when he asks?" she said rolling her eyes.

"I don't know…" she thought about it, what was the best way to get over the tiny crush she had on Draco? Go out with some other guy. This was using Dawson was it? No, he had to understand that she just didn't see him that way… romantically. Eww.

"Yeah I suppose I will… but maybe as mates to start with… you know, nothing too commity" she said wrinkling her nose in distaste.

Her friends laughed and they all went down to the great hall, along the way they ran into Dawson who asked Astoria to go with him as soon as her friends nodded to him behind her back.

He grinned and hugged her tightly, "I'm really sorry about the whole-"

"Don't be, its water under the bridge" she said, giving him a bright smile that somehow did not reach her eyes. Not that he noticed.

"Water- what?" he asked confused.

"Dawson you're a half-blood, how can you now know that phrase?" she asked impatiently.

He shrugged, "Dad loved magic, tries to get mom to teach him sometimes" he said rambling off as Astoria nodded and they walked to the Great Hall.

Her eyes immediately went to the Slytherin table and sought out Draco. She just wanted to see if he was-

Then she spotted him, drinking tea and looking just as ruffled up as he did a few hours ago, Pansy was glaring at him, her arms crossed and Astoria grinned to herself, pleased that Pansy was going to have a fit in front of the whole school over Draco sleeping with some slag.

"What are you looking at?" Dawson asked, following her line of sight, "_Malfoy_?" he spat out furiously and jealousy, hiding it rather well with disgust.

Nancy giggled, oblivious as always, "He came out of the girls dorm this morning when Tori got back from the hospital wing and he was very after-sex glowy" she said in a low whisper.

"Oh Merlin!" Megan said, "Parkinson is about to piss herself she's so angry. Are they still dating or something?" she mused out loud, not expecting an answer from her friends, who did not make it their lives to know his going abouts. Well except for one.

"No" Astoria answered immediately and rather importantly, practically before Megan had finished her question. Her friends looked at her funny and Dawson frowned.

"How do you know?" he asked curiously, that hint of jealousy still evident in his voice.

Astoria fought the blush on her cheeks and waved her hand vaguely, "Your forgetting my lovely sister is practically his little shadow… and Parkinson's bitch" she said nonchalantly.

Megan giggled uncontrollably and Heather just rolled her eyes. Dawson, however, did not crack a smile because he saw Astoria glance once more at the blonde sex-god sitting a table away getting yelled at in hushed tones by Pansy Parkinson.

"Draco where were you last night?" Pansy demanded, her arms folded tightly over her chest as she sat across from the disheveled blonde eating like he had just run a marathon, or had hot self-hate sex well into the night.

"I don't see how you think its any of your business Pansy, I can visit whomever I wish to. We aren't dating, hell we aren't even sleeping together. We aren't anything"

She looked pained but indignant, "I'm not a whore Draco! I wont be your fuck-buddy, _I love you_" she screeched, drawing the attention of most the table now.

Draco rolled his eyes and stretched like a cat, feral and slow, lazy but elegant. Drawing more eyes to himself, including Astoria who bit her lip at the sight of his taunt muscles on display.

Pansy was shaking, "Dracy why are you doing this? You know we belong together, and when we leave Hogwarts we can really be together, get a flat or something-"

Draco help up his hand for her to stop, "We need to clarify a few things Pansy: one, I don't need a flat, I've inherited the Manor," she gasped happily at this but he kept going, "two, you and I are not together now, nor will we be together after Hogwarts, and three, I never asked you to be my 'fuck-buddy' as you call it, you see I would rather claw my own eyes out" he said simply, calm and collected like a good Malfoy should be in such a situation.

Pansy was seething, she stood up and stomped in place, her eyes shut tight and her hands balled at her waist, she was making a horrible screaming sound under her breath that was loud enough for the whole hall to become silent.

Draco paused in eating his waffle but chewed more slowly as she kept up the dramatics. He glanced up at her curiously, wondering idly if she would blow a fuse in her brain.

Eventually she stopped and glared down at him, "Your bloody confused, and I know it. So I'm going to give you a few days, your going to collect your _fucking head_ and then we are going to pick up where we left off. _Good_" she yelled then stormed out of the room.

Draco lifted another piece of waffle to his mouth as all eyes were on him, he eyed a few of the people and merely raised his eyebrow, making them blush and turn away.

He glanced around again and piercing green eyes caught his for a moment, they were dancing with amusement and… hope? But were also slightly pained.

Draco looked away quickly when he saw the boy next to her slip his arm around her shoulder awkwardly, basically shoving her head into his armpit. Draco sneered and went back to his waffles.


End file.
